The holiday season – a time for giving, loving, and utterly spoiling our furry little overlords. It appears that more people are buying gifts for their dogs than their own flesh and blood. Because, let’s be real, who needs human relationships when you have a pup who’ll snuggle with you no matter what?

According to a recent survey, a whopping 70% of dog owners plan to buy gifts for their canine companions this holiday season. Meanwhile, only 40% of those same owners plan to buy gifts for their human family members. It’s clear that our priorities have gone to the dogs (pun intended). But hey, who can blame us? Dogs are loyal, loving, and never judge us for eating an entire pizza by ourselves.

We took to the streets to get to the bottom of this trend, and met up with local resident, Karen, who was eager to share her thoughts. “I’m buying a cashmere dog blanket for my pup, Mr. Whiskers,” she explained. “It’s because… well, he’s just so fluffy and stuff. And my sister? Oh, she’s getting a $30 gift card to Target. I mean, she’s always saying she needs new socks or something, so I figured that would cover it.” When asked why the disparity in gift prices, Karen thought for a moment before responding, “Uh, well… Mr. Whiskers is just really cold at night, I think. And my sister is, like, an adult and can just buy her own socks if she wants to.”

But what’s behind this trend? Is it a desire to make up for the fact that we’re all glued to our screens and neglecting our human relationships? Or are we simply trying to buy our dogs’ love and affection? (Spoiler alert: it’s working.) Whatever the reason, one thing’s for sure – our dogs are living their best lives, and we’re just happy to be along for the ride.

As we navigate this strange new world where dogs are the clear winners, let’s take a moment to appreciate the absurdity of it all. Who needs world peace when we can have puppies in matching holiday sweaters? So go ahead, buy that pup a new squeaky toy or a fancy dog bed. After all, they’re the only ones who truly appreciate us for who we are – Netflix-bingeing, pizza-eating, imperfect humans.